In case you missed the circus act in the RIC this week, Crazyville Richmond is getting a new entertainment baseball venue team. As Mr. Domino and his staff are sorting through the mediocrity of their four choices for a team name, Bart Hinkle uncovered a hilarious commentary from 1903. Apparently New York had this same problem with a new baseball team coming to town:
We’ve all heard some dashed good suggestions for a new name, from the Knickerbockers to the Harum-Scarums. I’m partial to the New York Cuspidors, myself. Cuspidors are bright and shiny and they are mighty good to have around — and they are going to be around for a long, long time. The name would certainly lend itself to some funny hats we could sell as novelties at the concession stands…
I’ll tell you what, though — “Highlanders” is a huckleberry above a persimmon compared with “Yankees.” As team names go, that’s just all wet…
And what sort of merchandise do you expect to be able to market with a name like Yankees? Preacher’s cassocks? Oilskin nor’easter jackets? Copies of Ralph Waldo Emerson’s “Self-Reliance”? …Perhaps we could employ someone in the likeness of Emerson’s physiognomy to read a few choice passages from “Self-Reliance” in the outfield during the seventh-inning stretch. Wouldn’t that be a treat.
No, gentlemen, if you stick with the New York “Yankees,” I can guarantee it will never work…
I, for one, sure wish it hadn’t worked. But alas, it did. For now, I’ll watch our notable Orioles’ commentator working for some other team in the playoffs. If I’m lucky, the visual that Andy put in my head will come to fruition.
Virginia is home to the Wahoos and the Hokies, so what are we concerned about? People still show up to watch football (eh, what exactly you’re watching in C’Ville this year is debatable) there, and people will watch baseball in Richmond. Including me. As long as I don’t win a gall bladder.
